"Just one" she said,
reaching for the large jar of jumbo cookies on the counter.
"Just as a snack."
The pop of the jar opening is a delightful prelude
To the crunch of a sweet melody.
It wasn’t long before it dissolved into a mess of crumbs.
Her catlike eyes
slink back to the cookie jar on the counter.
Her hand subconsciously reaches back in.
“Two wouldn’t hurt-
She places the second cookie
Into her salivating mouth-
Savoring the soft,
Her robotic chewing becomes routine.
Her hand snakes around the various cups on the counter
And dips back into the jar
Suddenly the jar was empty.
An uncomfortable feeling sets in.
Her hands flit to her thighs
Her breathing becomes ragged.
Those were jumbo sized cookies-
Why are you so dumb-
each one was probably 200 calories each-
I’m so fat-
I’ll never be like the models on TV-
I hate myself-
No one wants me-
Why can’t you be more like your sister-
Why aren’t you skinnier-
I just want to take a knife and cut off all of that fat-
I just want to die.
But her hand,
With a mind more powerful than her brain,
Propelled her body
to slowly reach for the family sized bag of chips on the couch-
The aftermath of yesterday’s movie night.
The loud crinkling of the bag
sounded almost comforting.
There was a second of hesitance-
A duel between mind and heart;
restriction and indulgence;
control and relinquishment.
But that was over quickly-
She barely had time to blink
Before her hand plunged into the bag.
By Judy Zhou
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